Thursday, March 25, 2010


I should have written this on Sunday to give you some in sight on my progress. But I didn't, so I will give you the obviated version. I think when I'm over tired and not feeling well, I feel more sadden over my loss then I do on the average day. Not saying that I don't miss him everyday, because I do. It just hits harder on those days. I had just worked 6 days, was over tired and my knees where killing me. I was out of meds and had to wait to see the DR on Tuesday. So I got nothing done, just sat and thought of Brad. Not productive. Didn't even get dressed. But by Wednesday I was all smiles, felt great, was enjoying the warm temps. The birds where singing and I had happy thoughts of Brad. And as I thought of Brad, I knew I was OK and he was happy that I was doing so good. I love spring, the trees are starting to come back, the flowers are coming up. The world is waking and it's all good. But on my drive home a strange thing happened. As I was approaching our road, I had a fleeting imagine of Brad's face in front of me, and I could actually feel my hand on his face. Keep in mind both of my hands where on the steering wheel at the time. And just as fast as it appeared, it was gone. It didn't scare me, or make me sad. It felt so good and so peaceful. I know he will always be with me. So I turned my radio up, open the sun roof and kept right on going. I love you honey.