Wednesday, May 5, 2010

When do the tears stop?

Last night we had a family birthday party for Richie. It was so much fun, all of us together. The kids had fun playing and dinner was soooo good. He liked all of his gifts and even got to play outside for awhile. So on my home I was re-playing the evening in my head and smiling. By the time I was halfway home I thought to myself, boy my allergies are real bad tonight, my eyes won't stop running. It was then that I realized I it wasn't my allergies, but I was crying. I had two silent streams running down my face. So why after 2 1/2 yrs does it still hit me as hard as it did then?

3RD Entry from my journal

JULY 15, 08
I think I’m feeling better today. I sure hope so. Thought that hot tub was fixed, not. Will have to try again. But I have hot water now. So that is a plus, nothing like a hot shower to make you feel better. My knees have been real bad for the last 2 weeks and doesn’t help. And I have been remembering some goofy times about Brad. Right now the sweet and tender ones make me cry so it’s the goofy ones that are making me smile. Like the time he stood me up on a date to go to a party with the guys. Someone threw a bottle and smashed his windshield. Guess who he had to call for a ride home? Or when it was icy and we pulled into the gas station (that he worked at) and he didn’t quite stop in time. Lets just say he lost his job and the owner had to replace the BIG window in front. Or the time Amanda dropped his fishing pole in the water. The time he put a new bathroom vanity in. Got everything connected, turned on the water and it was spraying all over the place. (it didn’t help with me laughing until I was sick) Then there was the time he was trying to make a ice rink for Stephanie and the little girl next door picked up the hose and sprayed him (he never finished the ice rink.) And we will never forget the steering box episode or when his desk was in the living room. How many times did he tip that chair over? Who could forget how many times he fell out of his truck when the gas tank was off. Not to mention when he lost his cool with object, usually the object end up at the curb, but he felt better. Besides I needed a new ironing board. Well I’m still smiling and I hope I will continue to do so after I get home.

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